The Year of Realizing Things
The cliche-ness around 'one year older, one year wiser' is true. I turned 27 twenty two days ago and this saying sums up my feelings to the T. The events taken place since my new year began has forced me into a place of deep thought, contemplating why I do what I do, what purpose do the people in my life serve, and why am I here. To some, if not monitored carefully, thinking this way can lead into a downward spiral of depression and anxiety. But thanks to a good sense of self brought to you by meditation, prayer, and being raised by a good woman, I am able to divide my attention, becoming aware of my external experiences all while being aware of my inner state. I've been trying my best not to judge myself during this process of self-observation because if I do, how will I ever move on from my mistakes? How will I ever forgive myself and others?
Any who, this time of reflection has made me realize a number of things. Things I'm working to change to prevent the disasters of tomorrow. Looking at situations from a different perspective and gaining a new understanding. Self awareness never felt so good. Below are the things I'm referring to: (things sounds weird after saying it so much btw).
The importance of being good to one another
First thing I really realized this past week and I think it's one of those that often get overlooked. Imagine what the world would be like if we were to offer an ear to listen to someone or a shoulder to cry on, sustain loyalty and respect between relationships, if 'ego' didn't exist -- at all times. Kids would grow up not hating their parents, insecurities and mistrust in relationships wouldn't be a thing, the need to steal someone else's shine wouldn't exist. This is what I envision the world to be like if we were good to each other. Acts of kindness and utilizing a positive vocabulary go a long way. These gestures are like seeds; after planting them, the work doesn't stop there. Nourish one another, for the sake of goodness and humanity.
Becoming less reliant on other's opinions the more you love yourself
There was a point in my life where I had to have someone validate situations for me in order to feel confident about the decisions I've made. It wasn't until recently that I began to let go of that toxic mentality. I began questioning if I'm living for myself or for others. Ultimately, it wasn't adding to my growth and I felt lost.
As I work on dusting off this excess negative energy, I have uncovered a newfound love for myself. I'm getting a better grip of my voice, holding my foot firm to the ground, and dare anyone to test my dignity.
At some point, you have to accept people for who they are
All I have known to do while walking on this earth is to go with the flow. Lately, I've been finding myself having... expectations... of people. Oddly enough, this is a new territory for me and to be quite honest, I don't know if I like it so much. These expectations have only driven me to disappointment and we all know that feeling isn't a nice one. It's easy to get caught up in your 'wants' and confuse that with your 'needs.' It's a conversation that at some point, you need to have with yourself. What is it that I really need in life? What really matters to me? Throughout these instances of disappointment, I guess I shouldn't be too mad because it's brought me closer to know what I want. There's some sort of clarity and peace that surfaces when you realize you can't change people. The 'wrong' fit isn't necessarily a bad thing - there's just something else that is meant for you.
Are there any major realizations you've had lately? Please share below if you're comfortable :)